Wednesday, March 12, 2014

What the Pump?

This morning was a typical hectic morning trying to wake J up for school. He is by no means a morning person so this is always a battle. By the time we actually get downstairs, we are always in a rush to figure out breakfast, pack lunch, update BG logs, get dressed, pack up his backpack and diabetes supplies.....then throw a 2 year old in the mix and it seems more like a circus act than a family.We live about 30 minutes from the school J attends, so this morning he got out of the door just in time to make it to school by 8 o'clock.

I continued about my morning as usual cleaning up, doing laundry, vacuuming and getting prepared for the day. Around 10 o'clock my cell phone rings, I can see on the caller ID that it's J's school.....cue a lump in my throat and rapid heart rate. I know by now that it is never a good sign when they call me. Today it was J's teacher and not the TA that normally does all of J's diabetes care. She informed me that it was snack time and they couldn't find J's Pump PDM in his backpack. What do you mean?? I ran downstairs to find it sitting there on the counter top!! Mom and Dad FAIL!!!!

I told her that I was almost ready and that I would be there ASAP but to go ahead and let him eat snack with the class ( I never ever want him to be different or to miss out on what the other children are doing)
I threw myself together as quickly as possible, got E ready and all packed up and we headed out the door. I was sick to my stomach that we weren't closer to the school because I knew deep down that every minute that passed his blood sugar was going higher and higher with no insulin covering the food that he just ate. How did I miss it sitting right there on the counter top all morning?

When I finally made it to the school it was recess time and as soon as he saw me he came running over with one of his little friends. I apologized that we forgot to pack his PDM and started the process of fixing it. His little friend saw me getting out the PDM, lancet and test strips and told me that he wanted to help! Bless his little heart, I could have hugged him! I told him that was very kind and that I would let him help me. He told me that he wanted to press the buttons, so I let him press the "confirm" button on the PDM screen and as I held the lancet to J's finger. He asked if he could press the button on the lancet, so I let him. J just sat there with a huge smile on his face. I gave the correction needed and thanked his friend for helping me take care of J and off they ran to go finish playing. It melted my heart to see his friend be so interested and wanting to help take care of J, I pray that J always has friends so supportive and caring of his diabetes!

Today was a day of mistakes. A situation that never should have happened, but we are only human. In this disease every high or low blood sugar is our mistake. A mistake in carbohydrate calculations, exercise, correction factors, basal rates.....this all lies on our shoulders! We make these decisions, not a doctor, not a nurse, just two parents praying that the care we give and the decisions we make will be enough to keep him healthy and strong. Today was an easy fix, but the guilt that I feel for causing a blood sugar in the 300's from a careless mistake, is something that I will never get over!   

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